Family Guy Porn Story: Megs Boyfriend Chapter 9
Author’s note: If you’re having trouble picturing Zack here’s a link to a pic: (sorry it seems it won’t let me post the link. Oh well, it’s at Deviantart undermy username of VictorTheBabysitter in my scraps section)
Family Guy.
Chapter 9: Double Date, Swingers, And An Evil Lobster
Meg, Zack, Brian, and Jillian were seated in a nice resteraunt at a table for three. Zack didn’t really want to be there, but Meg did and that’s why he’s here. After ordering, the two couples engaged in conversation.
“So, Zack,” said Jillian, “What have you been doing lately? I hope you stopped working at that dirty 7 Eleven with dad.”
“I once lived there,” said Zack coldly, “And I still work there.”
“Oh,” said Jillian.
“Zack, I’m curious to know why you can’t get another job,” asked Brian.
“Everyone else is afraid to hire me because they think I hate fat people,” said Zack.
“That can’t be true. After all, you do love Meg,” joked Brian. Everyone laughed, including Meg and Zack, “Seriously, though, you two are a beautiful pair.”
“So how did you two meet?” asked Jillian.
“I met Zack when I got stranded in uncharted Quahog,” said Meg, “It was during the Homecoming Dance that he said he was in love me.”
“So anyway,” said Zack, “How did you and Brian meet?”
“We both met at a Quizno’s” said Jillian, “And we both ordered the same sandwhich.”
“Wow, that’s, um… that’s… very interesting,” lied Zack.
“I know! Isn’t it?” asked Jillian.
The waiter then came with thier food. Jillian and Brian were sharing a lobster, Meg had salad, and Zack had steak.
“Finally!” said Zack.
“I was thinking after dinner we can go over to my apartment and swing,” said Jillian in a naughty manner. Zack and Brian then spat out their water… on Meg.
“Hey!” shouted Meg.
“SWING?!?!?” said Zack and Brian in unison.
“You’re my friggin’ sister!” said Zack.
“And she’s… Meg!” said Brian.
“C’mon, Brian,” said Jillian, “It’ll be fun!”
“Wait, maybe she means being on swings,” said Zack.
“Actually,” said Jillian as she wispered something into his ear. Zack’s eyes became as big as dinnerplates.
“OH GOD!!!” shouted Zack, “You guys are swingers?!?!”
“Not exactly,” whispered Brian, “I asked her to say this for the next date and we were gonna double date with Peter and Lois.”
“Ahh,” said Zack in realization.
“Sorry, Jillian,” said Meg, “But we can’t do it. I’m still 17.”
“Oh okay then,” said Jillian, “If you’re still underaged.”
When Brian and Jillian were about to touch their lobster, it hissed and then jumped and clamped onto Zack’s nose.
“BY DOSE!!!” Zack yelled, “ID’S GOD BY DOSE!!!”
“OH MY GOD!” Meg shrieked.
“Don’t panic!” said Jillian as she pulled out a 2×4, “I got it!”
With that, Jillian repeatedly hit the lobster, and Zack’s face rather hard.
“SDOP ID!!! YOUR ODLY MAGGING ID WORSE!!!” shouted Zack.
“What?!?!” said Jillian as she hit him again.
“He says you’re only making it worse!” said Brian.
Meg then took the 2×4 from Jillian and slapped the lobster off of Zack’s nose which flew across the room and shattered through a window.
“Zack, are you alright?” asked Meg.
“My nose is bleeding,” said Zack, “But other than that I’m okay.”
“That was a close one and OH MY GOD IT’S BACK!!!!” shouted Brian as he pointed to the lobster. It jumped back through the window and was coming towards Meg fast.
“I THINK I MADE IT ANGRY!!!” shouted Meg. The lobster then leapt at her, but Zack blocked it with a dinner plate. The lobster then got a hold of his finger which made Zack run around the resteraunt like a screaming maniac. He then ran into the back kitchen where he kept beating the lobster against the wall. He then managed to throw the lobster into a pot of boiling hot water.
“SEE YOU IN HELL YOU SONUVABITCH!!!” shouted Zack as he slammed the lid on the lobster before it could escape. The a strange dying noise could be heard from within the pot.
Zack then returned to his table all tired and stuff.
“…Okay, I think we should call it a night,” said Brian.
“Agreed,” said Zack.
“I trust that you had a pleasant evening?” asked the waiter, “And here is the bill.”
Zack, Meg, Jillian, and Brian then studied the bill.
“Um, did anyone remember to bring money?” asked Meg. Everyone else shook their heads.
“Somebody has to pay the bill,” said the waiter impatiently.
“I’ve got an idea,” whispered Zack to the others, “It seems that I forgot my wallet,” said Zack out loud, “But that guy’s my best friend and he’ll be happy to pay for us.”
Zack was then pointing to a random passerby who had no idea what was going on.
“Sir, I don’t know those people,” said the man.
“YOU LIE!” shouted the waiter as he pulled out a machinegun and chased the poor man. Zack, Meg, Brian and Jillian then fled the scene.
Meanwhile in the kitchen, the pot lid slowly slid off and out came… A LOBSTER’S CLAW!!!
“Oh no you don’t!” said one of the chefs as he slammed the lid back on and turned the temperature even higher.
“We really need to stop undercooking the lobsters,” said one of the other chefs.
End Chapter.